Surprise, Surprise

"Hey there love, let's get to catching up
'Cause I been thinking those thoughts that must have slipped my mind
That time that I left you there that night"

I replied "Let me remind you of the guy you failed to mention all along
'Cause your actions have consequences, and these are them"

I'll be your friend in hell
Until then I despise you
And I probably always will
I can't afford to make another mistake like this
'Cause this is more than I can take

I don't mean to leave angry
This is by your own device
I'm sure this comes as no surprise

Hey there babe, don't mean to cut you off
But I've heard enough lies, and you're dyin' to get caught
I'll let you go call all your friends

"Oh my god, let me describe to you this guy
His name is Ken, he's in this band that writes such
Awful songs about me, all the time"

You're god damn right

I'll be your friend in hell
Until then I despise you
And I probably always will
I can't afford to make another mistake like this
Well this is more than I can take

I don't mean to leave angry
This is by your own device
I'm sure this comes as

Oh, I'm fine
Just let me lie here for a while
'Cause I've been staying up, yeah, hanging up, all night

Oh, I'm spent
Of all attention I've given
To a hopeless case
To a sharp headache
To a choice you made
To the reason why
To the reason why I say

I'll be your friend in hell
Until then I despise you
And I probably always will
I can't afford to make another mistake like you

I'm sure this comes as no surprise (I can't take, I can't take it)
I'm sure this comes as no surprise (I can't take)
Surprise, surprise