How The Other Half Lives

[Miss Dorothy]
This is living! This is what I call living!
I've hungered for this day since heaven knows when
Year after year with a secret yen
All of my prayers, all my desire
Ev'ry waking moment with my heart afire

Give me the meat without the gravy
I'll take the oyster sans the pearl
Pinching pennies, clipping coupons
See a brand new world unfurl
Let me brown bag all my lunches
Try my hand at canned cuisine
A Berlitz class I long to pass
How the other half
How the other half lives

No fourteen-karat cronies, phonies
Fair-weather friends
I want an on-the-dole mate, soulmate
Stormy-weather friends

Pour me the milk but hold the honey
Bring on those funny money woes
Paying Paul by robbing Peter
Layaway to buy my clothes
Summer on the Isle of Coney
Winter in Hell's Kitchenette
I'll turn my dial to rank and file
How the other half

[Millie]
How the other half lives
Poor? Not me, honey
I don't want those money woes
I'll marry Paul or Dave or Rob or Peter
So I can buy my clothes at Saks Fifth Avenue
Bergdorf Goodman, too
The privileged few, plus you-know-who
How the other half

[Both]
How the other half lives

[Millie]
I'm on the way up

[Miss Dorothy]
I'm on the way down

[Millie]
It's a good thing we met in the middle

[Miss Dorothy]
Pour me the milk but hold the honey
Bring on those funny money woes
Paying Paul by robbing Peter
Layaway to buy my clothes
Summer on the Isle of Coney
Winter in Hell's Kitchenette

[Millie]
Poor? Not me, honey
I don't want those money woes
I'll marry Paul or Dave or Rob or Peter
So I can buy my clothes at Saks Fifth Avenue
Bergdorf Goodman, too

[Miss Dorothy]
A wild sojourn

[Millie]
So I can learn

[Both]
Livin' like the other half!